I Am Not A Crook

Charlie. 22. UK. Ask me if you want to know more about me. I'm really talkative on the internet. tagged/self is me.

lillyhasatumblr:

boongaloo:

spacemen-and-laserguns:

MY GOD.

THIS SONG HAD BEEN COVERED BY ED SHEERAN. JOHNNY CASH, JACK WHITE AND LIKE EVERYBODY BUT NO ONE DOES IT LIKE THIS KID WITH AN IPHONE. 

YOU NEED THIS. MY. GOD. 

THIS BOY WILL GO FAR IN LIFE I BETTER SEE HIM ON MY TV IN THE FUTURE

Jesus fucking christ take anything you want. 
Please do.

downloaded the app.

proceeded to do nothing with the app.

(via sleepxqueen)

puppiesarerad:

freddashdog:

Grandpa gets a surprise bulldog puppy for his birthday, something he’s always wanted.

It’s pure happiness for both of them

I’m fucking sobbing.

this made me so happy

(via deanprincesster)

stupidswampwitch:

masooood:

safeidgul:

Why can’t there be a male hooter’s equivalent where male servers are shirtless and highly sexualized for their bodies and looks

Male Strip clubs. You’re thinking of male strip clubs.

No. Not a male strip club. A strip club is a strip club. I want a place called Cahones where waiters wear Speedos and are forced to stuff if they don’t fill out their uniform well enough. I want them to giggle for my tips. I want it to be so normalised and engrained in our culture that women bring their daughters there for lunch (because whaaaaaat the wings are good! Geeze sensitive much?) where they’ll give playful little nudges like, “Wouldn’t mind if you dad had those. Heh heh heh.” that their daughters don’t even understand but will absorb and start to assume is just the normal way grown up women talk about grown up men. I want to playfully ask my waiter if I can have extra nuts on my salad and for him to swat my arm with an Oh, you because he knows if he doesn’t his manager will yell at him. I want other men to pretend to like going there so I think they’re cool. I want to go to Cahones during my lunch break at work and when I come back and tell the other women in the office where I went they chuckle slightly and the men around us suddenly feel self conscious and they don’t know why.

(via angryfeministbabe)

when someone horribly attractive starts following your blog it always puts a lot of pressure on.

ghoulfarts:

kafkai:

dilated:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise.

And then i assume that they are lying to make fun of me

Or wants to just sleep with me

or are just being kind

(Source: dilated)

my codeine pill got stuck in my throat…

… so I washed it down with another.